Finding joy everyday is something I think about a lot. I try to visualize the moments in my past where I have felt the most joy. Where am I? What does it look like? What am I wearing? Who am I with? Super specific. I’m am talking about the daily small moments of joy, not the “my kids” bring me joy big ticket things.
The definition of joy is “a feeling of great pleasure and happiness.” Which also means, joy is subjective, we all find our happiness in different things. My closest girlfriends listen to crime podcasts. This brings them joy. They love it. This makes my stomach turn. And that’s okay. The key is to really think about it, find your thing and figure out how to insert this into your life as much as possible.
Being a mom, our days can quickly get away from us, taking care of other people and the other million things that need to be handled. I used to think that women were crazy when they would say things like, “I forgot to eat” or “I didn’t have time to shower.” I remember thinking, that is just not possible. With three kids, I totally get it now. Our days are not our own for the most part. So making a plan of how I want my day to go and being purposeful in the decisions that I make everyday, I try to create as much joy (for me) in my day to day life.
Coffee brings me joy. Sitting alone in a quiet room slowly sipping coffee brings me joy. This will always be true. Prior to Covid, I was getting up at 4:30 every morning which guaranteed me almost 2 hours every day in the quiet to drink my coffee. Maybe that’s crazy, but for that season of my life, it was something that gave me joy, and I needed that time alone with my thoughts more than sleep. Watching the water makes me happy. Sitting on a beach or balcony watching the waves in the ocean or just the slow movement of a bayou. It just gives me life. Matt knows when I want to go to the beach, it’s the water I need. He lets me pick the location of our hotel or condo solely based on the views of the water. Matt loves to sit outside on a cold night and watch the fire. He could do this for hours on end. We have figured out ways to insert these things into our lives. We built an outdoor wood burning fireplace for cool nights to sit outside and enjoy the fire. We also have plans to build a home on the water.
Dinner or drinks with girlfriends, date nights, traveling with Matt, hotel rooms with warm comfy robes and aimlessly walking around a store alone. These are just a few of my favorite things. These bring me the most joy. Most of these are small, obvious things, but that’s the point. These can be the smallest moments during your day that bring you joy. Figure out what they are and figure out a way to add them to your days as much as possible. Life is hard and can be a scary road, so adding your tiny moments of joy intentionally will make it so much better. This, in my opinion, is the highest form of “self-care.” This is how you self-care daily. Because, let’s be honest, finding time for a mani/pedi, face mask, getaway, solo trip to Target or whatever your idea of pampering is can be tricky sometimes. Taking care of yourself doesn’t have to a grand event, it can be these simple moments all strung together that make the difference.
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